Thursday, February 15, 2007
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Friday, February 09, 2007
Thursday, February 08, 2007
It started out a good day.....
We had a great morning. The boys went to kidcare at the JCC so I could take my friend Sheila's class and they had a great time. Then we went to Monica's to get our hairs cut. Then we went home and took naps. Then we went grocery shopping. And through it all, my babies were wonderful. Mason left his "shirtie" at home when we went out, which is a HUGE deal (he says when he is 4 he won't need it any more....now if we could just get him to give up the thumb too) and neither one had any major fits.
Well, working out was my first mistake. Going to Monica's where she has a dog was my second mistake. Going grocery shopping in the cold rain was my third mistake. All of this added up to one big lovely.....visit to the ER. I used my inhaler maybe 6 or 7 times today and that is not good. What is even worse is that it wasn't working. So by the time Wolf got home at 7, I was trying not to panic, which of course, makes things worse. I didn't feel like this was gonna get better though so Wolf got mom to come home from work to take care of the kids and he rushed me to the hospital.
3 hours, 2 breathing treatments and 1 60 mg tablet of prednisone later, I am back at home feeling like the herd of elephants is no longer sitting on my chest but the mac truck that hit me has left tire marks. I'm exhausted but the prednisone and breathing treatments got me wired. I took cough syrup with codeine which may, or may not, help. It is now 11:40 and I want to sleep but can't. Luckily I am ordered to stay home tomorrow and the boys will be taken to school by Wolf, so I can just lay here and not to anything (something I very rarely do). It's a good thing Wolf bought me a new game for our wii. Woohoo.
And what is almost too scary is that 10 years ago at the end of this month, I almost died from asthma. The day was very similar to today in that all day I was taking my inhaler and it didn't work. Unfortunately at that time I was far less aware of my body and my asthma and I kept ignoring the signs. And Wolf and Toby did not know any better either. They assumed that I would know when I couldn't handle any more and something more drastic needed to be done. The problem was that I got so bad I began storing all of the carbon dioxide in my body and my body began trying to preserve itself by shutting everything down. Oxygen was also cut off to my brain and I was unable to think clearly. To make a long story short, 911 was called and when they arrived I said "you better hurry" then proceeded to pass out. I will be eternally grateful to those paramedics that saved my life (and I will forgive them the horrible track marks left on my arms). Wolf was told in the hospital in a not all that pleasant way that if he had waited 5 more minutes to call 911, I would have died. Nice, huh?
So, to think back on that and to realize how close I came to dying and how close to the anniversary date I am, kind of all creeps me out. Well, I did not get close to dying tonight, Wolf knew what to do better than I did and all is well. A little beat up but alive and breathing.
Gonna go watch some trashy tv and try to fall asleep.
I want to tell all of my family and friends that you are in my heart and even if I don't talk to you on a daily basis, I am thinking about you always.
Well, working out was my first mistake. Going to Monica's where she has a dog was my second mistake. Going grocery shopping in the cold rain was my third mistake. All of this added up to one big lovely.....visit to the ER. I used my inhaler maybe 6 or 7 times today and that is not good. What is even worse is that it wasn't working. So by the time Wolf got home at 7, I was trying not to panic, which of course, makes things worse. I didn't feel like this was gonna get better though so Wolf got mom to come home from work to take care of the kids and he rushed me to the hospital.
3 hours, 2 breathing treatments and 1 60 mg tablet of prednisone later, I am back at home feeling like the herd of elephants is no longer sitting on my chest but the mac truck that hit me has left tire marks. I'm exhausted but the prednisone and breathing treatments got me wired. I took cough syrup with codeine which may, or may not, help. It is now 11:40 and I want to sleep but can't. Luckily I am ordered to stay home tomorrow and the boys will be taken to school by Wolf, so I can just lay here and not to anything (something I very rarely do). It's a good thing Wolf bought me a new game for our wii. Woohoo.
And what is almost too scary is that 10 years ago at the end of this month, I almost died from asthma. The day was very similar to today in that all day I was taking my inhaler and it didn't work. Unfortunately at that time I was far less aware of my body and my asthma and I kept ignoring the signs. And Wolf and Toby did not know any better either. They assumed that I would know when I couldn't handle any more and something more drastic needed to be done. The problem was that I got so bad I began storing all of the carbon dioxide in my body and my body began trying to preserve itself by shutting everything down. Oxygen was also cut off to my brain and I was unable to think clearly. To make a long story short, 911 was called and when they arrived I said "you better hurry" then proceeded to pass out. I will be eternally grateful to those paramedics that saved my life (and I will forgive them the horrible track marks left on my arms). Wolf was told in the hospital in a not all that pleasant way that if he had waited 5 more minutes to call 911, I would have died. Nice, huh?
So, to think back on that and to realize how close I came to dying and how close to the anniversary date I am, kind of all creeps me out. Well, I did not get close to dying tonight, Wolf knew what to do better than I did and all is well. A little beat up but alive and breathing.
Gonna go watch some trashy tv and try to fall asleep.
I want to tell all of my family and friends that you are in my heart and even if I don't talk to you on a daily basis, I am thinking about you always.
Thursday, February 01, 2007
Amy's Photo Corner
Most of you come here to see pictures and updates of the kids, which is, after all, why I created this site. But if you notice in the upper right hand corner, above the picture of me, there is a link to Amy's Photo corner. This is where I am posting other photos that I have taken.
As many of you know, I have been into photography for quite some time but until just recently took mostly pictures of the kids. Wolf bought me a beautiful macro lens for christmas and I have been having an insane amount of fun with it. Please check out my corner when you have a moment and I would welcome any comments.
Now back to you regularly scheduled program......
As many of you know, I have been into photography for quite some time but until just recently took mostly pictures of the kids. Wolf bought me a beautiful macro lens for christmas and I have been having an insane amount of fun with it. Please check out my corner when you have a moment and I would welcome any comments.
Now back to you regularly scheduled program......
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
Meet Isabel
This is Isabel and she and her family could use our help. Isabel has just been diagnosed with leukemia at the age of 5. It started out as the flu and just progressed from there. I am putting this on my blog asking that anyone who reads this please check out Isabel's website www.helpisabel.us and help in any way you can.
It is a parents worst nightmare, to have to watch their children suffer, and I pray to whatever forces are at work above that I never have to. But if I did, I know that I have friends who would be there to support us every step of they way.
Thank you for reading this and thank you for any help you can give.
Sunday, January 14, 2007
Tuesday, January 02, 2007
Thankful
I am profoundly thankful for the life that I have and I often wonder how I came to be so lucky. I was having a conversation with a woman named Ann yesterday, who is a doula and massage therapist, among other things, and we were having a wonderful conversation about life. About how it is that we end up where we are. Her belief is that we choose our parents, that we pick them for the lessons they will teach us and the life they will provide for us. Wolf and I talked about that very thing when we were working on getting pregnant (not that we had to work hard since it only took one try both times). We felt that when the child we were meant to have was ready to come to us, it would. And just like I feel that Wolf completes me, I feel my boys complete us. We are a team, a good, strong solid team that has its ups and downs, but will always triumph.
I wonder every day if I'm a good mother. I used to think that that was what I was put on this earth to do, to birth two boys, these two boys. But I am often terrified that I will somehow fail them, that I am not a patient enough, calm enough, gentle enough mother for them. And then, as I type this, Mason comes walking quietly out of his room with a big shy smile on his beautiful face, knowing he should be sleeping, and climbs up in to my arms as I meet him halfway across the floor. "I just had to come out and tell you that you are warm and cozy and fresh, mamabear." Which can only be topped by his closing argument of "how did I get so lucky to have the best mom in the world?"
My heart swells and my chest aches. He is a good boy, a kind and gentle, good hearted boy and although we can only take partial credit, as parents, it makes me feel a little bit better, a little less guilty about my bad parenting skills. At least until tomorrow.
I wonder every day if I'm a good mother. I used to think that that was what I was put on this earth to do, to birth two boys, these two boys. But I am often terrified that I will somehow fail them, that I am not a patient enough, calm enough, gentle enough mother for them. And then, as I type this, Mason comes walking quietly out of his room with a big shy smile on his beautiful face, knowing he should be sleeping, and climbs up in to my arms as I meet him halfway across the floor. "I just had to come out and tell you that you are warm and cozy and fresh, mamabear." Which can only be topped by his closing argument of "how did I get so lucky to have the best mom in the world?"
My heart swells and my chest aches. He is a good boy, a kind and gentle, good hearted boy and although we can only take partial credit, as parents, it makes me feel a little bit better, a little less guilty about my bad parenting skills. At least until tomorrow.
Monday, January 01, 2007
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)